im sick of alot of things. i can't wait to move out, for one. i can't wait for this life to end, for another. trials after another. i guess its time i stop avoiding them. just face and the bleeding knock them over, one after another. it happens one after another. when would i bleeding learn? i hate it. i also hate the fact that kinship and friendship are most important to me. curse that thrice-accursed fact. time after time, its just all these nonsensical crap happening that wears and tears me apart. enough enough enough. i hate their reactions.

couldn't slp last night after that talk i was just distracting myself with those books. then i was remembering the things of then. zzz too much dependency, too many eggs in this basket. lol. zzzz even with my eyes closed i was thinking this. i wan the friendship, not the relationship

this holidays sucked. i to be honest, hoped for some quiet companionship. got that in one outta 14 days. there are few things that i enjoy more than companionship. i guess that was one of the things that i liked about landp. lol. i guess im just lonely. zzzzzzzzzz=.=

yeah sure, going out with friends was great. in fact more than great. it was outta the world. anna, van and soon had opened new perspectives for me to understand and comphrehend. its increasingly enjoyable to be normal again. no more liking. thats stupid. poly only. what do we know? like seriously. why bother emoing and moping over one person? lol. we still have 60 years laid out infront of us. thats kinda a waste right? well, always look on the good side of life! haha! we have the Lord. so whats there to fear? hahaha not ghosts, not life not anything! hahaha!

hahaha! ytd i watched nanny McPhee and the big bang! was quite nice! so far, 9 days. watched 3 movies already! zzz i nearly wrote 10 by accident. imagine if thats true! zzzz crossing my fingers that that job thingy would be successful. 3 days for 168. i already know how to spend it. i need that spare cash. haha. now im slacking for what i also dunno. but very hot! that i do know. waiting to go church, leaving soon, but very tired still. Zzzzz TODAY went marchite reservior, walked from venus rd's car park to the suspension bridge and back. total? 7-8 km, 2 hours. on bike? 45 mins? zzzzzzz quite nice the place. sianz. forgot to bring camera. bring also cmi, cannot take macro. zzzz thats why i wan a dslr! ZZzzzzzz.

the clouds are beautiful from my room. the light effect causes it to be like a painting.

oh well, the usual boring ' TODAY'

went shopping with my mum at vivo cause she took half day off. then i bought a wallet, 1 pants, 2 casual formal tees and one long sleeved shirt. took me an hour or so to finish fitting them all. and i stupidly wore a buttoned casual formal tee and JEANS there. can you imagine the hassel?!?! haha. zzz it was quite ex. but G2000 got offer so o wells! now waiting for aunt to bring me to church meeting. cause i dunno how to go! haha! well, i can't wait for our 'date' next mon. XP and i can't wait for tmw too! but i dunno tmw will got or not >< then tmw must chiong hw alr and play piano! haha!

Zzzz its like the scenario in the hols totally shifted. to the oppositte =.= why can i have the best of both worlds? oh wells. >< it feels kinda weird.

not a good day for me today. okay, that wasn't honest. the afternoon part was brilliant, the now part is like shit. for some reason im on the edge, blew twice whilst chatting. brilliant =.= and its for crapped up reasons. seriously i hate that. since 4 months ago, it comes and goes, comes and goes. i wish it would go for good. in fact, i should make it Go forever.

hahaha im glad i made that mentality swtich from don't mind having one to i don't wan to get into one. ^^

dear, ur one crazy crappot. =.=
hahaha!

Yeh!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!! Woah!!! Lahhhhhhhh!!!